I know I’m late to the party. The McRib Girl made her pitch to the Santa Clarita City Council back in November of 2015. I didn’t see the YouTube video until November of 2016. If you haven’t seen it, here it is:
Now anyone that knows me, knows that I love the McRib. I look forward to its return every fall, and am usually disappointed to see it go just before spring. This year, I didn’t indulge as much as I had in years past because of, well, Fat Tony (see previous post). If I could get away with it, like McRib Girl, I would also have 10 McRibs and 50 chicken nuggets for Thanksgiving dinner.
I enjoy the McRib so much, it has become somewhat an annual tradition for me to write a poem about this delicious pressed pork treasure. For some reason, the McRib was a little late with its arrival in Central Indiana this year. When I wrote the poem, It had not yet arrived. Here it is:
The holidays are upon us
Thanksgiving drawing near
With Christmas soon to follow
It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year
But our country seems divided
Gone are cheer and bliss
Absent is our unity
Something seems amiss
Epiphany did hitch a ride
As I drove down Rockville Road
The golden lights, once so bright
Has seemed to lost its glow
With our nation at a crossroads
I run the risk of sounding glib
Just one thought occupies my mind
“Dude, where’s my McRib?!”
That tasty, tangy hoagy
Is nowhere to be found
I hereby issue an Amber Alert
Let every ear be to the ground!
Left wing, right wing; dog or cat
Whether you are poor or you are rich
Make America Great Again
And find my favorite sandwich!
Now when I first saw the video of McRib Girl’s plea to the Santa Clarita City Council, I wasn’t truly on board. Yeah, I write goofy poems about the McRib, but I wouldn’t really ask government to get involved with McDonald’s business. I figure Ol’ Ronnie Mac has enough to worry about without Uncle Sam breathing down his neck.
But today, I saw this gem:
Ok. She has at least got me on the boat. I still don’t think government should be involved, but she does have a great idea. In the song, she suggested buying a McRib sandwich for those who oppose her or question her motives. As simple as that is, it’s genius! Hey, I watched The Wire. When Avon Barksdale’s boys were out slinging “Pandemic” and “WMD’s”, they would always give someone “a taste” first, right? Get them hooked and drive up the demand! Well, the McRib is the fast food equivalent to crack, so…
And who can’t appreciate the Dylanesque approach that McRib girl uses to further her cause?!?! Quite frankly, she had me at harmonica.
So even if I don’t agree with the City Council approach, I stand in unity with McRib Girl in that the McRib should not be discontinued in any market! McRib’s for all!